Our Summer
by summaluv14
Summary: It's been two years since Belly chose Jeremiah, two years since she evicted Conrad from her heart. It's been two years and Belly still wonders if she picked the right Fisher boy.
1. The Beginning of the End

**_Hey guys! So, this is my first fanfic so it might suck a little! Don't be too mean, but constructive crtisism is much appreciated! REVIEW PLEASE!_**

**_(Oh, and this story takes place after "It's Not Summer Without You", about two years after that book ended. Hope you enjoy!)_**

It's been two years. Two years since I chose Jeremiah. Two years since we started dating. Two years since Conrad told me to go with Jere. Two of the happiest years of my life.

After I graduated, I started going to Brown with Jeremiah and Conrad, Taylor came too. At first, it was a little akward dating Jeremiah around Conrad, but we eventually eased into it. The summer before my second year at college was one of the most important ones of my life.

It all started the last day of school, I had just finished my last final and I was heading over to Jeremiah's dorm to celebrate. I climbed the familiar steps and walked through the hallway I had memorized. When I got to Room 6A, I didn't knock, just walked in. And what I saw, was just, unbelievable. Because what I saw was my boyfriend, my sweet, amazing boyfriend and Taylor, my best friend, laying in Jeremiah's bed, cheating on me. I don't know how long I was standing there before they even noticed me. But eventually, Taylor did. Her eyes opened wide and she gestured at me to Jeremiah. When Jeremiah saw me, he tried to talk to me, but I couldn't look at him.

I ran out the door, tears already streaming down my face. I ran down the steps and out the front door of Jeremiah's dorm complex. I kept running, untill I couldn't run anymore. I ended up right in front of Conrad's dorm complex. I probably shouldn't have, but I went inside. I knocked on his front door softly, half-hoping he wasn't there. He was. I can't timagine what he thought. Opening the door to find his ex-girlfriend with tear-stained cheeks just standing there, looking at him. I give him credit, he didn't run the other way when he saw me. He gestured for me to come in, and I did. He shut the door and just looked at me for a long time.


	2. I Know You

"What happened?" Conrad asked me. I squeezed my eyes shut tight and just shook my head. "I'm guessing it had something to do with Jeremiah, or you would be over in his room instead of mine."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come." I said as I got up to leave. He blocked my way out.

"It's okay Belly, you can stay if you want."

"No, I really should leave." He nodded as I walked towards the door. Before I opened it, I wiped my tears away and took a deep breath. I headed out the door and saw someone comign towards me. It was Jeremiah, he had just rounded the corner, I didn't think he saw me. I quickly backed back into Conrad's room and locked the door. Conrad shot me a quizicle look and then a moment later, thier was a knock on the door.

"Open up, Con! It's Jeremiah! Open up, man!" Jeremiah called from the other side of the door. I shook my head pleadingly at Conrad, begging him not to tell Jere I was here. He just nodded at me and pushed me gently over to the side were Jeremiah couldn't see me when he opened the door.

Conrad opened the door wide enough to make Jeremiah think he wasn't hiding me but closed enough to not let Jeremiah come in. "What's up, Jere?" Conrad asked him calmly.

"Have you seen Belly? I looked for her at her dorm but the person across from her said they haven't seen her since this morning." Jeremiah replied worriedly.

"Sorry, man. Haven't seen her. Did you check with Taylor?" It was silent for a few minutes after Conrad said Taylor's name. I could feel the akwardness radiating off me and Jeremiah. I think Conrad could too.

"I, uh, don't think she's with Taylor." Jeremiah mumbled.

"Dude, what the hell happened?" Conrad asked. Jeremiah was silent for a while. He seemed to be debating whether or not to tell Conrad what really happened.

"Well, I guess she'll probably tell you anyway. I-uh, I- I," He couldn't seem to get the words out. And then he blurted out, "She cheated on me."

'What?' I mentally said. "What!" Conrad really said.

"Yeah, I saw her kissing some guy on the quad." Jeremiah answered.

"Really? Belly? I didn't think she could do something like that. Well, I'll call you if I see her." Jeremiah just murmured a 'thanks' and was on his way. Conrad closed the door and waited for Jeremiah's footsteps to fade away.

"Wholey crap! That did not just happen." I whispered.

"I know, Jeremiah just lied right to my face." Conrad exclaimed.

"How did you know he was lying?" I asked, confused.

"C'mon, Bells! You really think I would believe you cheated on Jere? I know how much you love him, you wouldn't do that."

"Well, Con, sometimes people in love do cheat. Or maybe Jere was never really in love with me." I whispered.

"Wait up, Jere kissed someone else?"

I nodded. "Taylor, and they were doing a lot more than kissing." Conrad looked astonished. And I was just done with it all. "Listen, I know it's kind of wierd, but can I stay here tonight? He's going to be staking out my dorm for a while and I don't really feel like seeing him right now." I asked.

"No problem, Bells. Stay as long as you want." Conrad replied.

"Thanks, Con."


	3. Bonding & Marriage

So, I stayed. We just talked the whole night. It had been the longest time since we talked, and it was nice, just catching up with him. Eventually, we got hungry, so we ordered a pizza. The whole night we laughed and joked, and had a great time. At around two o'clock in the morning, we just finished watching an old horror movie. The whole time we were watching it, we were making fun of all the cheesey special effects. We were laying on his bed discussing it afterwards.

"Wow, that was absolutely..." Conrad started.

"Amazing?" I finished.

"I was going to say horrible, but yeah, that too." We both started busting up laughing.

"You know, Conrad, tonight was a lot of fun. I forgot how much fun we have together. I forgot how safe I feel with you." I whispered the last part.

"Me too." He replied simply. At that moment, I realized how close together we were. Close enough to ... kiss. He kissed me, long and soft. At that exact moment, we heard Jeremiah from the other side of the door.

"Belly! I know you're in there! Listen, I'm sorry! I'm so so sorry! You don't know how sorry I am. I didn't mean for anything to happen. I just, panicked! I panicked because of how much I love you! Taylor came over looking for you, and I just, I did something stupid, that I regret to the fullest. I love you so much. The reason I was freaked out about us is that, well, I was planning to propose to you tonight. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Forever and Always. I love you, Isabel Conklin, and I want to marry you if you'll let me!"

I opened up the door, and there he was. He was down on one knee, and in his hands was a little black velvet case. And in that case, was the most beautiful ring I ever saw, and it was one I recognized. "Is that, is that Susannah's wedding ring?" I asked quietly with awe. He nodded, beaming at me. "Oh my god," I whispered.


	4. The Reasons

The next day we were all on our way to the beach house. I still couldn't believe what had happened last night. Me and Conrad kissed, Jeremiah proposed for goodness sake! And with Susannah's ring, that was just unfair. How was I supposed to say no to Susannah's engagement ring? So I didn't say no. I didn't say yes either, though. I told Jeremiah that I just didn't know. I told him that I didn't know what to think with him having sex with my best friend and then proposing to me in the very same night. And that was true, but that wasn't all the reasons why I put off saying yes or no.

The other reason was that kiss. When Conrad kissed me, everything I thought had gone away had come back. All those old feelings, came rushing back and just blinded me. Jeremiah was my first kiss, but Conrad was and always be my first love. So, where did that leave me? I could just right off the kiss, I could just pretend it didn't mean anything. I could say yes to Jeremiah, marry him, spend eternity with him. But I just didn't think I could do that, because that kiss, that kiss _did_ mean something. But what it meant, that I didn't know. What I did know was that I couldn't make any decision, especially one that determined my whole future, without really thinking deep down at what I wanted, what I needed. And I wasn't quite sure how to do that.

So, I told Jeremiah that I needed a little time to think things through. And that began with me not riding up to the summer house with him like I had the two previous years. That also meant that I was riding up with Conrad. I mean, It wasn't exactly that I _wanted_ to ride with Conrad, it was just that I couldn't really tell Jeremiah that he also couldn't ride with Conrad either, and I wasn't positive if Conrad wouldn't tell Jeremiah about our little kiss. And if Jeremiah found out about that kiss, that wouldn't be good for anyone.


	5. Confessions

We got to the beach house first. Jeremiah called and said he had gotten a flat tire, but that he was only about 15 minutes away. I had almost without my knowledge taken out the ring Jeremiah said for me to hold on to and started twirling it in my fingers. Just thinking about the very thing it would mean if I said yes to it, or no to it. "Why didn't you say yes?" He asked me. I looked over at him, surprised. I thought about what I would say next.

"He cheated on me with my best friend." I answered simply. I knew that wasn't the only reason. And i guess he did too because then he said.

"That's the only reason? The only reason you didn't say yes to your future?"

"Isn't that reason enough? It isn't my future if I don't want it to be, Conrad. It's _my_ future after all, isn't it?"

"Well, yeah. But I just thought that maybe you didn't say yes because of last night. You know, when you kissed me?"

"Okay, first, I did not kiss you, you kissed me. And second, how do you do that?"

"Do what?" He asked, ignoring the first part.

"Just say what you're thinking all the time! You think I just forgot about the kiss? No, of course not! I just didn't bring it up because it was extremely akward thing to say!" I yelled, furious.

"It's really not that hard! Why don't you try it sometime?" He yelled back, furious that I was furious.

"You don't want to hear what I think, Conrad!" I screamed.

"Oh, and why would that be? Because you don't actually want to face what you actually feel?" This was getting intense, fast. I honestly didn't know how this fight would end up.

"You want to know what I think? I think that you fisher boys have done nothing but screw me over! I loved you since forever and when we finally get together, you ditch me! And then, I picked Jeremiah, and guess what? I gave my heart and soul to him, and he had sex with my best friend! I think that you and him might be plotting against me. I think you and Jeremiah are trying to figure out how to tear my heart apart over and over again! I think that I honestly don't know what to think anymore!" I was crying. And I mean, really crying. It felt like I had just gotton a thousand pound weight off my shoulders, but there was still so much weighing me down. I felt like something had broken inside of me, like something had healed, just a little bit.

I didn't look at Conrad when I walked out the side door and towards the pool. I could tell that he was coming after me, watching me, but at that moment, I didn't care. I kicked off my shoes and then my socks. I pulled my tank top over my head and I unbuttoned my shorts. I was standing there, with just my lacey black panties and my bright pink sports bra on for a total of five seconds. And then, I was in the water, and it felt so damn good.


	6. Closely Talking

_**Hiya, guys! I got my first review! YAY! Big thanks to **__**ImagineAsian2270**__** for that AMAZING review!So, here's another chapter! Hope ya like it, reviews very much appreciated!**_

**~~~JEREMIAH~~~**

When I got to the house, I knew something was wrong right away. I could hear screaming inside. I could recognize the voices, it was Belly and Conrad. I didn't have to strain my ears to hear what the hell they were screaming about. "You want to know what I think? I think that you fisher boys have done nothing but screw me over! I loved you since forever and when we finally get together, you ditch me! And then, I picked Jeremiah, and guess what? I gave my heart and soul to him, and he had sex with my best friend! I think that you and him might be plotting against me. I think you and Jeremiah are trying to figure out how to tear my heart apart over and over again! I think that I honestly don't know what to think anymore!" Wow, I thought. Belly is really hurting. It was silent for a few minutes, and I was tempted to go drive around the block a few times so they wouldn't know I had been eavesdropping. But then I heard the side door open and then a few minutes later a splash. I knew it was Belly in the pool, she was the only one who would ever just leave after a breakdown like that.

I walked through the front door hesitantly, not wanting to get a look from Conrad when he found out I had been eavesdropping. But he wasn't in the kitchen like I thought he would be. I walked through the still open sidedoor and I saw them both. Belly was just floating in the pool, and then I realized she was just wearing underwear and a bra. I was almost kind of pissed at Conrad for just sitting there, watching my fiancee', girlfriend, whatever Belly was to me after last night, in her underwear. But when I looked at him he gave me a look that said, yeah-I-know-that-she's-half-naked-and-I'm-right-here-but-we-got-bigger-problems. And I sort of gave him a look that said, yeah-you're-off-the-hook-for-now-but-it-better-not-happen-again-plus-what-are-we-going-to-do-about-her?

I think Belly could tell that we were silent-talking about her because she suddenly sighed loudly and a little frustrated. "I'm fine. Just felt like swimming, you guys. I'm fine." She told me and Conrad. She sounded confident, and her words were clear. I was relieved that she was okay. Even though I had sex with another girl, Belly was the one I loved. She would always be the one I loved. I wondered if this was how Belly had felt about Conrad before she had picked me. Maybe Belly was my Conrad? I don't know, but that metaphor didn't sit right with me. Conrad had left Belly in the dust, and she hadn't even done anything to make him not love her. But with Belly, I had done the worst thing a boy could do, so really, why wouldn't she leave me? "Conrad, can you go get me a towel? I have a feeling my uh, 'modified swimsuit' is going to be just a little bit see-through." Conrad nodded and quietly go up without a word.

Once Conrad was back in the house, Belly swam over to the side of the pool and easily lifted herself over the edge. She immediantly flipped her hair down and rung it out. Then she flipped her head right side up and at that moment, she looked prettier than an model I had ever seen. Her hair was stringy, but in a good way, and her hair looked like it had little flecks of red in it, which only happened when she got out of the pool. Her tan was already showing and her legs looked like they went on and on forever. Her arms and calves were slim and muscular. She looked like she might either start dancing in someone's lap or break out in a sprint.

She must have noticed how intensely I was staring at her because she blushed just a little bit. When I met her eyes, her big, unbelieveibly grey eyes, she stared right back into mine. I walked closer to her, and she didn't make any indication that she was going to move away from me. I took that as a good sign. I leaned in to kiss her but she stopped me just before my lips met hers.

"Jeremiah, what are you doing?" She asked me in a whisper voice.

"Me? I'm just talking to you very closely." I answered in the same noise level.

"Good, because I'm still not sure about us, just yet." She whispered.

"That's fine. Take all the time you need."

"Thank you." She said most quietly of all. Then she tilted her head just a little and kissed me softly on the cheek. Then she walked away, through the side door into the house. She was no doubt going to go ask Conrad what was taking him so long.

I had meant what I said. I wanted Belly to take as much time as she needed. I wanted her to be sure about me. I needed her to be sure about me before we got married. But, really, I just wanted her to be sure about me as soon as possible. I missed her. We had only been kind of broken up for not even a day, and I missed her. Without Belly, I was just Jeremiah. I longed to be _her_ Jeremiah again. And I would do anything, _anything_ for that to happen.

_**Aw, Jere! I kind of feel bad for him, he did cheat on her though. FYI, the part about Belly and Jere 'talking close' I got from this TV show called Psych. Anybody heard of it? If you haven't, check it out, it's pretty hilarious. **_

_**ALSO, I NEED YOUR HELP! I still have a couple more chapters written for this story, but then it kind of just stops, on account of me having writer's block. Inspire me guys! Send me ideas, what do YOU want to happen? **_


	7. This Summer

I couldn't believe how brave I was with Jeremiah. Instead of kissing him, I told him I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure about him, us, or even me at this point. And that had been so much harder than it had sounded in my head. I longed to kiss his lips. I need to kiss him like I needed air. It was essential to live. But the whole time, I just thought to myself how long I had existed before I had even thought about kissing Jeremiah. I could exist without his lips for as long as I needed to figure things out.

_Oh, but the way he had looked at me! _It was like he was ready to tear the remaining clothes I had on, off and just be with me right there. And that would've been our first time if I had let that happen. We had been tempted to have sex many times before but I always managed to gain control of myself and my emotions before things got that far. I was making him wait. He told me that he understood. He told me that he didn't want to do anything if I wasn't ready for it yet. The thing was, I was ready for it. I wanted it so badly. I wasn't scared, I wasn't afraid. I just, I don't know how to explain it. I just was?

"Belly, I got your towel, I would've brought it out to you." Conrad said to me from out of no where, scaring me to death. I had completely forgotton about the towel. And the fact that I was half naked. In front of Conrad Fisher. I snatched the teddy bear towel that I loved so much out of his hand and wrapped it around me.

"Thanks, Conrad." I thanked, trying to get past him to go to my room. He moved so I couldn;t get past him.

"Are you sure you're okay? You kind of had a mental breakdown a half hour ago." He asked. I blew out hard making my bangs flutter in the temporary breeze.

"I'm seriously, one hundred percent, okay. And I didn't have a mental breakdown, I had a fight with you, so I did what you asked me to."

"Which was?" He asked, confused.

"To tell you what I was thinking." I said obviously. I moved to get past him the other way but he moved again.

"Wait, so you mean to tell me that you meant all that stuff you said?" Conrad demanded.

"Um, yeah. I just said that, don't you listen?" I asked, getting frustrated that he wouldn't let me pass. "Conrad, let me pass, I need to get out of these wet clothes!" I whined finally. He moved without a word, still thinking about what I said. Just as I reached the top of the stairs, he called up to me calmly, like he was still thinking.

"Your bag with all your clothes is down here." I just stopped. Took a few deep breathes and rolled my eyes. I mimiced him as I hopped down the stairs. I gave him a dirty look as I grabbed my bag and bounded up the stairs once again. When I got to my to my room, I stopped. Just froze. Because when I opened the door, it all came back to me. When I looked in that room, I realized that I was in my favorite place. All the memories of summer's past came to me and I was overwhelmed with all the amazing things that had occured here. My first love. My first kiss. My first heartbreak. My first boyfriend. My first perfect moment. My life. And this summer, well, who knew what it would bring?


	8. Look What the Cat Drag In

_**Here ya go, guys! A suggestion from ImagineAsian2270 led me to introduce another character from the real books. I don't know if that actually released tension at all, though! I think I defeated the purpose. I added more tension. What can I say? I'm a sucker for drama.**_

After I changed out of my wet underclothes and into my yellow cotton sundress, I went downstairs to get something to eat. Halfway down the stairs, I heard Conrad answer the doorbell. A few seconds later I heard a mumred 'shit', some intense whispering and then some hysterical yelling. I ran down the rest of the stairs to see what the heck was going on. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I stopped. There, standing in the doorway was Taylor. She was yeling at Conrad to tell her where I was. Conrad was trying to tell her to get the hell out of here.

When Taylor spotted me, her eyes sunk even deeper than they already were. "Belly! I'm so so sorry! I went to your dorm this morning and you weren't there so I though maybe you had come up here because I remember you talking about it and I'm so incredibly sorry, Belly! Please, Belly, please, just forgive me!" She cried. Taylor seemed like she was about to crack. She was pretty close to the edge of insanity right now. I just walked over to her and she seemed to take that as a good sign. But Conrad, he saw it as the bad sign it was. He tackled me right when my fist would have hit Taylor's pretty little face.

"Get off me, Conrad!" I screamed. I struggled to get out from under him, but he kept me locked in his grip. I was beyond angry right now. I didn't feel like myself, I wasn't myself. Soon, Jeremiah came in to see what the hell was going on.

"What the hell? Get off her, Conrad!" Jeremiah yelled, outraged. I can only imagine what he was thinking in that moment. Probably how he was going to murder Conrad.

"Jere, just calm down. I can't really do that."

"Why the hell not?"

This time it was me who spoke. "He tackled me when I went to knock out your gilfriend. Or was she just a sex buddy?" Jeremiah swallowed, embarassed. Conrad looked at me with a mixture of surprise and respect. No one could believe I just said that, including me. And then I suddenly noticed Taylor was gone. "Where'd the bitch go?" I asked casually. Conrad looked up, searching for her. I guess he was just as preoccupied by our current state as I was.

"I'll go look for her." Jere volunteered.

"Of course you will." I murmered. Jeremiah threw his hands up in the air.

"What do you want me to say to you, Belly? I already said I was sorry a million times. What else do you want me to do?"

"I want you to make it so I can trust you again, Jere." I said sadly. "But I don't even know if that's possible anymore." He looked so freaking sad. It broke my heart to tell him that, but I had to. I felt a lone tear roll down my cheek. Dammit, I was not going to cry right now. I tried to wipe my face but I realized something had my hand locked in place. It was Conrad. I had forgotten he was literally on top of me. Jere and I had just had a very important moment in our relationship, and Conrad was on top of me the whole time. Great.

"Get off me, Conrad." I sighed. He looked at me as if to say hell no. "I'm fine now, really. I have to go find Taylor." Conrad reluctantly got off me, still not sure if I was gonna go all street fighter again. He helped me up off the floor. I wiped away the single tear and brushed off my clothes. "Alright, if I'm not back in a half hour, call an ambulance." I looked at both of them. Neither laughed at my sorry attempt of a joke.

_**What did ya think? Was bringing Taylor in a good choice? Feel free to send me suggestions for this story! This chapter would have gone a completely different direction if someone hadn't sent me a suggestion. So, send me some! I'll most likely love and use them all!**_


	9. Forgive, But Don't Forget

_**A longer chapter than usual. It's probably because I feel guilty for not updating as much as I should. I've just been really focused on this other story that's also in-progress. I'm going to try to do this story more often, though. REVIEW and let me know what you think!**_

I walked along the beach slowly. When I walked out the front door and saw Taylor's car sitting in the drive, I realized she couldn't have gotton very far. And since Taylor had only ever been her once, and that was years ago, I knew she wouldn't have gone into town. So that left the beach.

I had only been walking for five minutes when I saw her. She was sitting down and I could tell she was crying by the way her whole body shoke. A part of me knew that even though she had betrayed me in the worst way possible, she was a part of me. And it broke my heart to see her so sad. But another part of me, a lesser part, was glad that she felt what I had felt.

She hadn't heard me walking up, so she was pretty surprised when I was suddenly sitting next to her. She cowered away from me, probably thinking I was going to try and hit her again. "I"m not going to hit you, Taylor." I sighed. She looked at me, trying to decide whether or not to believe me. I guess she decided to, because she relaxed just slightly.

"I still can't believe you tried to hit me." She whispered. I rolled my eyes.

"Really, Taylor? You can't believe that I would hit you?" She winced at my harsh words, I sighed again. I didn't come to find her to be mean. "I'm sorry I tried to hit you. I just, I got caught up in the moment."

Taylor nodded slowly. "I understand. That's what happened with Jeremiah." Belly considered her next words carefully, not wanting to say the wrong thing and it come out too harsh.

"What _did_ happen, Taylor? I already talked to Jere about it and he has a pretty good excuse. What's yours?" I made my voice soft, so that she wouldn't take it the wrong way.

"I really don't know, Belly. I went over to his dorm to lok for you, and he just seemed so stressed out. I sat next to him, just trying to calm him down, and soon we were kissing. Then my shirt came off, then his,-" Belly held up her hand, shaking her head.

"Please, no details. I don't need to hear details."

"Right, sorry." She shrugged apoligeticly. And then, "I really am sorry, Belly. I'm so sorry. I'm the worst best friend ever. I really hope you can forgive me someday. I love you Cinder-Belly, and I'm really sorry I hurt you." She smiled a little wistfully at the thought of my old nickname.

"I forgive you, Tay. I really do. That whole thing about forgive and forget, though? I don't believe in it. I can forgive you Taylor, but I can never forget what you did. I can't forget how awful I felt after I saw you with my boyfriend. I don't think I'll ever be able to."

"I guess that's fair. I really hurt you." She replied sadly.

"But, I still want to be your best friend. I love you too! And this thing that happened is definetly going to change our friendship. But it doesn't have to be for the worse. We can grow stronger from this."

"You really mean it?" She asked me, beaming.

"Yeah, but it's going to take some time, Tay. This was a pretty big thing."

"Of course, Belly! We can get through this! We're Taylor and Belly for heaven's sake!" She exclaimed, tackling me with a fierce hug. I just laughed into her hair. She pulled away from out hug and looked at me, still smiling her face off.

"Since we're friends again, I have something monumentally life-changing to tell you."

"What is it?" She asked worriedly. Her eyes darted to my stomach. Her hand flew over her mouth. "Oh my gawd, are you PREGGERS?"

"No! No!" I blushed, looking down at my stomach. Jeez, I hadn't gained _that_ much weight! "No, nothing like that! Besides, you very well know I haven't done _that_ yet."

"Well then what? What is so gosh dang life-changing?" She asked curiously and a little anxiously.

"Jeremiah asked me to marry him." I said slowly, waiting to see her reaction. She simply gaped at me, jaw practically hitting the floor.

"What? When? How? What did you say?" She screamed. Her eyes were wide and she still looked like she was in shock.

"One question at a time, please!" Belly cried, feeling the hugeness of it all over again.

"Okay. First, what did you say?" She replied, trying to calm herself down.

"I told him I didn't know! It all happened so fast. I told him I needed time to think about it."

"That's very reasonable. How did he do it? Was it super romantic? Or was it more like a desperate attempt to win you back?"

"Oh,Tay. That the craziest part."

"Crazier than a marriage proposal?" She seemed almost scared for what I would say next.

"Way crazier. Okay, so after I, uh, walked in on you two...together," Wow, this was an extremely akward conversation, but she had to tell _somebody!_ "I was really upset. I just kept running, and when I stopped, I was in front of Conrad's dorms." Taylor groaned loudly, already anticipating what I was going to say next.

"Oh, Belly! You didn't!"

"I did. Well, it wasn't like that at first. I knocked on his door, tear stained cheeks and all, and we just hung out for a while. I mean, I couldn't go back to my dorm, I knew Jere would be there! So I stayed and we just...hung out. It was actually kind of nice, he made me forget momentarily about the craziness that I had just witnessed."

"So? Did you guys do it?" She asked, getting a little excited now.

"NO! Gosh, get your mind out of the gutter, Taylor!" I exclaimed. How many times did I have to tell her I was still a virgin? "We kissed. It was really sweet. Then, I hear Jeremiah outside his door. He proposed to me, THROUGH THE DOOR!"

"NO!"

"Yes."

"Holy crap."

"Right? That's not even the most epic part."

"What the hell is epicer than kissing Conrad and Jeremiah proposing to you in the same second."

"Susannah's ring. He proposed to me with Susannah's ring."

"That is just playing dirty!" I nodded my head in big up and downs. "What are you going to do?" She asked me quietly after a few moments.

"I honestly don't know what to do. Taylor, what am I supposed to do?" I whispered back. Tears were starting to form in my eyes. Any second they would spill over, revealing just how lost I was to the world.

"I can't answer that one for you, Bell. But I can tell you one thing. No matter what happens, I'll be here for you. Best friends 'til the end." I smiled sadly at her as she gently grabbed my hand. And I realized that Taylor had screwed up big time. But how many times have I screwed her over too? It didn't even matter if I wanted to just hate her forever. I couldn't. She was _Taylor._ She was my best friend. I couldn't deny her anymore than I could deny my feelings for Conrad.

And there it was. I had finally admitted it to myself. Conrad was and probably always would be in my heart. Whether I chose to act on them, to develop them, to show them, was the real choice. A choice that I was going to make that summer, once and for all.

_**I know that in real life best friends would not have made up this fast (or at all) in this big of a betrayal. I just hate it when Taylor and Belly are fighting, it makes me depressed. I don't even like Taylor that much! Anyways, hope you guys liked this chapter!**_


	10. Situations

Both Jeremiah and Conrad had been surprised when I came back with Taylor, arm in arm. We had been reminicing about old times and we were laughing hysterically when we walked in. Jeremiah just stared at us, shocked. Conrad looked mildly surprised but eventually just shrugged and moved on. Jeremiah continued to stare at us. I could tell he was thinking how I had fogaven her so fast and easily and was still cold towards him. For once, I didn't care. I had decided on the beach that this was going to be MY summer. The one were I made everything make sense.

It happened the next day. I was utterly exahusted, having just spent the last couple hours jogging up and down the beach. Taylor had made me go, she had fed me some crap about keeping fit so I could attract some boys without the last name Fisher. I went because I was still a little worried about her pregnant commet the day before.

Taylor, damn her, actually _enjoyed_ it. She was sweating and panting just as hard as I was, but she had a bright smile on her face to. Once we had gotton back the house, I told her I needed a shower to live. She shrugged and told me that she'd see me back at the house later. She said she wanted to go to the beach. When I asked her why on earth she would want to spend a second more in this heat, she replied with a annoyingly cheerful, "Are you kidding? My body is literally glistening with sweat right now, you know how hot I look?" When I gave her a do-you-need-to-be-comitted-look, she just smiled and said that I looked even hotter.

After we parted ways, I walked into the house slowly, thinking I could probably pass out right here on the front porch. As soon as I felt the air-conditioner hit my face, I felt a million times better. I almost smiled. I walked grugingly up the steps to my room where I promptly collapsed on my bed. I laid there for a few minutes before I realized I was crazy thirsty. I sighed as I slid off my comfy bed. Since I had seen no onw when I came in, I figured everyone was out and about doing thier own thing. I stripped down to my plain black boy shorts and black sports bra before I headed back down the stairs to the kitchen.

I had just rounded the corner when I saw Conrad standing in the kitchen. He had his back turned to me so I quietly tried to backstep back towards the stairs before he could turn around and catch me in my indecency. "Freeze." He called out, actually causing me to freeze. He turned around smiling and then his smile faultered when he saw me. He gave me a contemplating look while he shook his head. "Really?" He asked me simply. I was relieved that he didn't sound mad or embarassed. He seemed like he was kind of amused for some odd reason. "March back up stairs, soldier." Yup, he was definetly amused. I didn't even have enough pride in me to shot him a glare, I just marched back up the stairs like he told me as fast as I could.

When I got to the bathroom I shut the door behind me and just stood there. I took a deep breath and just thought over what had just happened. Conrad had seen me in my underwear. And my stomach was literally glistening with seat. Oh god, I had just remembered what Taylor had said. _My body is literally glistening with sweat right now, you know how hot I look? But you Belly, you look even hotter._ I didn't know whether to feel prideful or embarassed. I finally decided on both.

I turned the water on and stripped my clothes. I just stood there a moment letting the scolding water heal my aches and I heard Conrad coming up the stairs, I thought he was going to come and yell at me for taking such a long shower. Just as I was about to turn the water off, I sliped on the bar of soap I had dropped earlier but was too lazy to pick up. My ankle twisted in a wrong way and I hit my head hard on the edge of the tub. "Crap!" I cursed loudly. There was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Belly, are you okay in there?" Conrad called from the other side of the door. This time I cursed silently to myself. I tried to get up from the tub floor but my ankle screamed in protest and I was starting to get dizzy. Double crap.

"Just come in here for a sececond, would ya?" I called to him as loud as I could. I could almost feel the hesitation and confusion radiating from the other side of the door. But finally, I heard the door open.

"Belly? What the heck happened?" He asked after he entered the small bathroom. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I think. Just, uh, turn of the water and hand me one of those towels, please." Without even a word of question, he did what I asked him to. His hand just barely peeking into the curtain when he was turning off the water and handing me the towel. I tried to wrap the towel around myself but I couldn't get it around my back since I was laying down. I tried to stand up to tie the towel around me, but I only ended up crying out in pain.

"Belly! Damnit, are you okay?" His hand hovered around the curtain like he was debating whether or not to open it. I quickly draped the towel over my body before he could yank the curtain aside. When he did, he fell silent. "Did you, did you fall in the shower?" He asked incrediously.

"No, I just got tired and decided to take a little nap! Of course I fell! I can't get up though, I think I broke my ankle, and my head is throbbing." He just stared at me for a moment, and then suddenly, he burst out laughing. If I could have reached him, I would have hit him. This was so not funny. "Are you done?" I asked impatiently.

"I'm sorry." He gasped. "It's just, it hasn't even been a hour and you've managed to put us in another extremely akward situation." He finally stopped laughing. I continued to glare at him, but he just smiled. "So, what's the plan?"

"I don't know. I can't get the towel around to my back side, so you can't really help me out of here if I'm going to be naked." With a perfectly straight face, he asked my why not. "Because, it would be really inappropiate!" I whispered angrily. "And unwanted!" I added.

"Okay, Mrs. Touchy. Why don't I just help you put the towel on?" He asked, moving towards me.

"No, no, no! Conrad, no! Don't even think about it." Before I knew it, he had knelt town by the edge of the tub and reached out for me. I started to hit him, to try to swat him away.

"Okay, we both know that your girlish fists of fury will not stop me from helping you. Now, if you stop hitting me, I garantee I won't try anything while I'm down there." I stopped hitting him. He smiled. "That a girl." His hands grabbed the towel and stretched it towards my back. He was doing his best, but he just couldn't life me up with one hand and stretch the towel with the other. "Okay, I'm going to close my eyes. I'll close my eyes and help you stand. And then, you can put the towel on while I hold you up." I nodded even though I didn't really want to. What choice did I have? I made sure he had his eyes closed before I made any attempt to get up. He helped me silently stand, and I made sure his eyes were closed the whole time. I put all my weight on my left foot and tried to block out the pain coming from my head and right my eyes on him, I wrapped the towel around me. It suddenly hit me what exactly was happening. I was naked, and Conrad was literally right in front of me. One move and I could change everything.

"You can open your eyes now, Conrad." I told him quietly. He opened only one eye at first, making sure I wasn't lying. He smiled.

"Okay, um, I guess I have to carry you to your room." He held out his hands for me. I took one and he wrapped the other one around my waist to help me over the ledge of the tub. After he made sure I was steady, he wrapped his hands around em and picked me up easily. He careully turned to make it out the bathroom door and easily walked me over to my bedroom and then to my bed. He set me down gently in an upright position on the edge of my bed. "Do you need to go to the doctor?" He asked me worriedly.

"No, I'm perfectly fine, thank you. " He looked at me, unconvinced.

"If you're so fine, why don't you try to stand up." I glared at him and did what he said. My ankle immediantly gave way and I fell back on the bed, making my head hurt even more if that was possible. I didn't even look up at him.

"Just go get me some clothes, dammit." I murmered. I could just hear his laugh as he walked over to my dresser. Well, wasn't this turning out to be a wondeful day?


	11. Love Him Still

I walked downstairs the next afternoon warily. Partly because I was extremely tired, partly because my head and ankle still throbbed with pain from yesterday, and a big part was that I was still recovering from the akwardness. I had tried to put it off as long as I could, staying my room most of the day. It was already five o'clock when I finally saw another human being. When I walked into the kitchen, I found Jere leaning against the counter, eating a apple.

"Good morning!" He greeted cheerfully. He gave me a big smile, which instantly had me catious. Jeremiah was always happy, but he wasn't always _this _happy.

"Eh," I replied dumbly as I walked over and opened the cupboard, searching for a glass. His smile instantly faultered.

"What's the matter with you?" He asked mockingly, but I could detect a hint of sincere worry too.

Hm, so Conrad hadn't told him about it. Probably because it wasn't as big of a deal to him as it was to me. Yup, that't probably what happened. "I just-, I really need to get out of this house. Have any ideas?" His smile returned.

"Actually, I already planned an exciting day for us."

"Great, what are we doing?" I asked, the day already starting to look up even though I was supposed to be keeping my distance from this particular Fisher boy. But right now, I needed a break from the other one.

"That's for me to know and for you to dot dot dot!" He replied. He had a huge grin on his face and I just stuck my tongue out at him. "Oh Belly, don't be you ten years ago. Now, go get ready! We're leaving in an hour!" He called over his shoulder as he walked past me and towards the stairs.

"Wait!" I called after him. "What should I wear?"

"Something sexy!" He shouted loudly from upstairs.

* * *

><p>As I looked myself over in the mirror, I considered Jeremiah's suggestion. I knew he had been kidding, but if he wnted to be snarky, whatever. That didn't mean that I couldn't have some fun with it.<p>

So, I had decided on a lacy white summer dress. The same one I wore two summers ago the day Conrad had taken his midterms. The day I kissed Jeremiah for the second time. The day where everything seemed to change once again.

I paired the dress with simple black sandals with a little white rose at the toes. I did my hair into a french braid, and actually put on some makeup. Only mascara, eyeliner, blush and lip gloss but it still made me look so much different. And I just knew that Jeremiah would think first before he ever told me to dress sexy again.

The look on Jeremiah's face when he saw me was simply priceless. I had seen the look before, I mean, we had dated for two years, of course I had seen it. But it was all the more flattering when he was trying to hide it.

"Are we ready to go?" I asked him, hiding my own smile.

"Huh? Oh, yeah." He replied fumbling for words. His smile returned as he led me out the door and towards his car. In a true gentlemanly fashion, he held open the car door for me and gestured me in. Once we were both situated in the car, he started the engine and pulled out the driveway.

"So, where are we going?" I asked, trying to be as sly as possible.

"Not-uh. I'm not telling you. You're just going to have to wait untill we get there."

"Right. So, were exactly is 'there'?"

"Belly!"

"Fine. Fine! I'll wait."

And so, I waited. He finally pulled over within walking distance of the boradwalk. I looked over at him, silently asking what the heck he was up to, but he just smiled and climbed out the car.

After we had been walking on the boardwalk for about five minutes, I finally saw something in the distance, a light. And suddenly, I knew exactly where we were going, and somehow, I _would _get out of this.

"Jere, I'm not feeling too well. Maybe we should just go back to the house." I said, grabbing my stomach for emphasis.

"No way. You're fine, you liar. We're going."

"But Jere," I almost whined.

"Belly, you used to love going to the carnival! And then all of the sudden, you just stopped going. It's been years since you last went! We are going, and you are going to have the time of your freaking life!"

I pouted but nodded in a reluctant agreement. He seemed pleased with himself for convincing me, leading the way to the dreaded lights.

* * *

><p>An hour later, I <em>was <em>having the time of my life. I had forgotton how much I truely loved the carnival and all that it brung with it. Fattening food, stuffed animals, dumb games, and of course, the ferris wheel.

"Oh, Jere! Can we go on the ferris wheel? Pretty please!" I begged, my big stuffed unicorn Jere won me at one of the games bouncing up and down with me. Jere smiled back at me, more amused than annoyed that I wanted to go on the ferris wheel.

"And you didn't want to come." He murmered as he lead me over to said ride.

When we were finally strapped into our seats and the ride started moving, my eyes were glued out the window. I watched as the night waves crashed onto the shore and stared at the starry lights in the dark sky.

"I forgot how much you loved the ferris wheel." Jere said with a chukle.

I turned my eyes away from the window to face him. "Me too."

"When was the last time you went to the carnival, anyway?" It was silent for a moment before I answered.

"The last time I went to the carnival I was twelve." I replied somewhat sadly.

"And what happened then that made you never want to come again?" He asked nonchalantly. I looked at him curiously, but he just kept his gaze locked on mine. I broke the eye contact with him, looking down. I took a deep breath before I responded.

"I went with Conrad." I said simply, knowing that's all I had to say for him to understand. He looked down this time, nodding his head.

"God, I can't believe you ever loved him." He thought aloud. I just nodded my head, not saying anything. Not telling him that I knew I it was dumb to love him. Not telling him I still did.


	12. Loves Me Still?

_**Hey guys! I know, I am seriously a horrible person. It's been forever since I updated, before yesterday, at least. So, two days in a row of updating, because I am seriously guilty of lack-of-updating.**_

Jermiah and I spent the rest of the night walking along the boardwalk, reminincing about old times. It was almost three in the morning when we got back to the beach house. We entered the house and walked up teh stairs as quietly as we could. When we got to the stop of the stairs, we stopped before we went off in the different directions our rooms were in.

"I had a lot of fun tonight." I admitted, smiling up at him.

"Me too. I forgot how much I love to just be with you." At this, I looked down.

"Jere, -" I started.

"No, Belly. Just tell me one thing. Do I still have a chance? Do _we_ still have a chance?" He asked, so hopeful that I had to tell him what he wanted to hear.

"Yeah, I think we do." I told him, hearing the truth in my voice, surprising me.

He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. I knew how much it meant to him for me to say yes. Before I knew it, he was kissing me. It was soft and gentle, like he was getting used to me once again. He broke it off quickly, like he was afraid to overstep. But that one kiss reminded me of how much I enjoyed kissing him. So, I brought my lips to his once again, this time more passionate. We were full on making out in a matter of seconds, and then one noise made us jump apart.

In a way that seemed so familar, Conrad caught us kissing. This time, his face showed no emotion, at least none that I could detect. Jeremiah turned back to me and whispered a goodnight before he walked off to his bedroom, leaving me alone with Conrad.

We looked at each other for a long moment, trying to tell what the other was thinking. I broke the contact first, wordlessly walking to my own room, leaving him standing there, alone. Just like he had done to me so many times before.

* * *

><p>The next morning, I crept to Jeremiah's room. I knocked lightly once, then waited for some kind of noise to indicate he was there. When I heard nothing, I pushed his door open slowly and found his bed empty, unmade.<p>

I slumped down the stairs, disappointed. I was hoping we could talk about last night, but I guess that had to wait for now. Instead, I found Conrad, leaning against the cabinets, reading a newspaper. I stopped for only a second before I continued to make me way to him.

"Good morning," I greeted. He peered over his newspaper, nodding in lieu of a hello. "Have you seen Jere?" I asked as casually as possible. This time he seemed to freeze, then lowered his newspaper slowly.

"He went to go get breakfast. Don't worry, your boyfriend will be back soon." He looked at me in a way that I guessed was supposed to make me feel guilty, but instead, I was just annoyed.

"He's not my boyfriend. You know that."

"That's not what it looked like last night." And now, I was angry.

"What's your problem?"

"I'm not the one who has a problem." He said, trying to walk away. I grabbed his shirt and spun him around to face me.

"We've already established that I have many problems! Now why are you so pissed about me and Jere maybe getting back together?" I practically screamed at him.

"I'm not pissed. Just a little bit disappointed. Didn't think you were the type." He said calmly in a way that pissed me off even more.

"Didn't think I was the type to what?" I yelled.

"The type to take back the guy who cheated on by having sex with your best friend. I guess I was wrong, though." Ouch.

"I'm still not sure if I'm going to take him back yet." I defended, my voice already starting to quiet down. His rose.

"Oh, we both know that's a load of crap, Belly. You may not have conciously decided that you were, but trust me, you are."

"What makes you think you know me so well, huh? What makes you believe you know everything I'm going to do before I do?"

"Because I _know _you. I've known you my entire life."

"Well so has Jeremiah."

"Oh, I'm not doubting that."

"Why do you say it like that?"

"Because he had to really know you to know that you would take him back after he cheated. He had to know you to know that you would second guess everything if he purposed to you with my mom's ring." I stayed silent, knowing he was exactly right. But I couldn't let him know that.

"Are you done?"

"No, the list goes on and on! Belly, he had sex with your best friend! How are you going to take him back after that?"

"I put up with a whole lot worse from you." I told him. I knew it was a low blow, but right now I really didn't care. His facial expression showed me that I succeded in pissing him off.

"I never, never, even _thought about _another girl when I was with you."

"Why not, though? You certainly had the opportunity to!"

"Because! I loved you! No only did I not want to think about other girls, I _couldn't _because you're all I think about." His present tense use when he was talking about me being on his mind all the time did not escape me. I chose to go in a different direction entirely.

"Your supposive 'love' for me never stopped you from breaking my heart into pieces a million times over." I told him, my voice cold and detached. I didn't want him to know how much this conversation hurt. He didn't have to respond because at that moment, Jeremiah walked in.

"Hey, guys. I got donuts!" I didn't look at him. I just kept staring at Conrad, tears starting to spill out my eyes. "Belly?" Jeremiah asked, noticing my state of distress.

"I'm not hungry." I murmered to him as I walked out the door and run towards the beach.

_**The last chapter I got a whole lot of help from **_ImagineAsian101_**! Like, this story would probably just be abandoned without her help. So, thank you, thank you, thank you, to her! This chapter I got a little bit of help from my bestest friend, Karen. So thank you to her amazingness also! :)**_


	13. Rekindling

**_Remember me? _**

I ran down the beach until I felt the water at my feet. I stood there for a few moments, breathing hard. I looked out onto the vast, empty, ocean. What would it be like to just swim, and keep swimming? Leave everything behind, all of this drama with Jeremiah and Conrad, Conrad. I took a few steps back and fell into the sand.

I sat on the beach, my mind wandering off. I dragged my finger throught the silky sand, making random letters and shapes. Does Conrad...does Conrad still like me? Wait, why does it matter? It wouldn't change anything! He's messed with me too many times, saying he wants me and then taking it back. Yeah, Jeremiah screwed up. Big time. But at least he apoligized and showed genuine remorse for what he had done. Never once had I heard a "Sorry for breaking your heart." from Conrad.

And besides, it's _my _love life. And Conrad just wasn't apart of that anymore.

I glanced up at the waves, pushing and pulling at each other. It reminded me of Conrad and Jeremiah when they wrestled.

Steven would wear a whistle and a black cap which somehow made him the referee. He would watch the two closely, waiting for the inevitable sign that things were getting too serious. Because it always would. Jeremiah and Conrad's matches were the real deal. Blood always made an appearance. Once, it was mine.

It was one of the more intense of thier matches. Earlier in the day, they had gotton in an arguement that they clearly weren't yet over when they started wrestling. Jeremiah reached for my ankle, thinking it was Conrad's arm, and pulled. Hard. I fell to the floor and my head hit the edge of the coffee table on the way down. There was a nasty scrape on my neck and the wound started bleeding immediantly.

Conrad gave Jere absolute _hell_ for it. After he was done ranting at him, Conrad rushed to my side. He quickly laid my head in his lap while ordering Steven to go get my mother. The rest of the night, Jeremiah said sorry ten times every five minutes and Conrad kept fluffing the pillow for my neck and shooting me worried glances when he thought I wasn't looking.

I blinked and the flashback ended. I stared down at the space beside me, shocked to see what the 'random' figures in the sand were.

_**I'm soooooo sorry for not updating in like, forever, but I've been going through some unbelieveable stuff lately. Anyway, this story only has a couple more chapters, guys! REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW IF YOU'RE STILL THERE!**_


	14. Breaking Up

I was so lost in staring at the figure I drew that I didn't hear him coming until he was right beside me.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked me.

I looked up at him. His face was one I had memorized long ago, both by sight and touch. It was the face of my best friend, my ally, but only now did I realize that it wasn't the face of the man I loved.

"Hey Jere." I took a deep breath. "We need to talk." He groaned.

"Belly, don't. Don't do this."

"You don't even know what I'm going to say."

"Belly, the only instances where anyone says the words 'we need to talk' together in a sentence is when someone is dumping someone else." I cringed. He did know what I was going to say.

"Jere, I'm not the one for you." I told him softly. He jumped to his feet, which made me jump slightly.

"No! Don't say that! You don't get to say that! You _are _the one for me, Belly. You're the _only _one for me! I made a mistake! People make mistakes!" He cried.

"It's not about that. The cheating." I looked up at him. To my horror, his face went from completely and utterly broken to emotionless with my words.

"Oh. Right. I should've known. It has nothing to do with me and everything to do with you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked even though I knew what it meant. Even though he was right.

"You're still in love with him, Conrad. You never stopped loving him." When I didn't say anything, he sat down beside me and looked out onto the ocean.

"Please don't hate me." I whispered. I hadn't even meant for him to hear, but he did. And he laughed, of all things.

"Belly, I could never hate you. I love you. And yeah, I wished you loved me back but I could never hate you. Especially not for this." I squinted my eyes and looked at him, long and hard.

"Why not?" I demanded. "Why aren't you mad?"

"Because I knew it all along. I knew it when I first started liking you, when we started dating, I for sure knew it when I cheated on you. I knew it when I was kneeling outside my brother's door, proposing, not letting myself dwell on the fact that it was him you ran to."

Well didn't I feel stupid. Apparently even Jeremiah had known how hung up I still was on Conrad. I blew out a big breath of air I hadn't even known I was holding.

"So what are you going to do?" He asked me after a while.

"What do you mean, what am I going to do?"

"When are you going to tell Conrad you still love him?" He told me, rather exasperated.

"Um, never sounds good."

"What?"

"I'm serious, Jere. I don't plan on telling him, ever."

"Why?"

I sighed loudly. "Because, he doesn't love me back! I can't put myself through that kind of hurt again! I _won't _put myself through that again." I turned to look at Jeremiah again when he didn't say anything. I was surprised to see him angry again.

"Belly, do you honestly still believe he doesn't love you too?" I gave him a curt nodd. "Well, you're wrong. He does. And even if he didn't, you can't not tell him! That's a whole other kind of hurt to put yourself through. And that one lasts forever."

"I just can't, Jere."

"Belly, you _have _to! If you aren't going to do it for yourself," He paused, and sighed. "do it for me. Because I'm sure as hell not letting you go if the reason for our breakup isn't that important to you."

"It is important, Jere. I wouldn't have broken up with you if I didn't think it was important." Jeremiah threw his hands up in the air.

"Well there you go! Now, go!" I looked at him like he was crazy, but he just shooed me away. So, I left the boy who loved me, the boy I knew I could be happy with, the boy I knew I could have, to go tell the other boy I loved him.

Because I was so busy overthinking things, I didn't notice Jeremiah noticing my little drawing in the sand.

_**Review! xoxo**_


	15. Coming Clean

I walked towards the beach house, desperately trying to find _something _to say to him. Something that would truly express the mix of feelings I felt whenever he looked at me a certain way, or even when he just walked into the room.

I stopped short when I reached the sliding glass door that would led me to him. Ready or not, here I was. I could turn back, run the opposite direction and never think about this again. But I was almost certain that I actually _couldn't._ I could turn back. I could run in the opposite direction. But to never think about this again would be impossible.

If I did just run away from this, try to pretend it never happened, it would destroy me. Wherever I went in life, I would always go back to this. I'd always wonder what could have been. How different things would be if I had told him the truth.

I took a deep breath and entered the house, already hearing Conrad in the kitchen.

"Hey, can I talk to you for a second?" I asked him quietly. He looked up at me from his laptop and stayed silent for a long while.

"Didn't say enough this morning?" He mocked. I winced. This was _so _not a good sign.

"It's kind of about this morning, actually." I paused, waiting for some sort of aknowledgement from him. When a couple moments passed, I decided to just screw it. I was way too hyped to turn back now.

"This morning, what you were saying? You were right." A slight flicker of surprise crossed his face before it was masked with the usual indifference. But his perfect facade was cracked. I could see the hope in his eyes, and from that, I drew hope.

"You were right." I repeated. "But I didn't want to admit it, especially not to you, especially not to myself. Half the reason I was so pissed at what you said was because it came from you. I just stood there thinking, 'who is he to judge another man?'. And afterwards, when I ran onto the beach, I tried so hard to hold on to the anger I felt towards you. But I couldn't. Because I was too busy holding on to the love I feel towards you." The first tear fell from my face and I was actually surprised I had made it this far.

"Because I always have. And I'm starting to think I always will." More tears. "I ran away this morning, Con. Like I always do when it comes to you because I was afraid. I was afraid to love you. And I'm still afraid, but I realize now that the way I love you is not in my control." I dared a look at his face and it looked absolutely heartbroken.

"I'm done with running away, Con. I'm here. No matter what."

"Belly..." He choked out. And there it was. It was all in that one simple, familar word. To me, coming from him, it meant no, again.

"It's okay, Conrad. I didn't expect any more than for you to just hear me out. Thank you, for everything." My voice cracked at the last word, because I truly meant it. I was so thankful for every moment I had spent with him, good and bad.

I walked out the front door in physical pain from what had just transpired. It hurt, so much. But I would live, I would survive this. Because, now I knew for sure. If I hadn't have said those things to him, there would have always been that what if. And _that _would have left me far from alright. Because it's the not knowing that kills you. Slowly and painfully.

**~~~Conrad's P.O.V.~~~**

I walked onto the beach shortly after Belly left. I quickly found Jere and sat next to him. I wanted to be alone more than anything, but I had to know if he knew what had led to Belly's big reveal.

"How'd it go?" He asked, even though I knew he knew that it hadn't gone well due to the fact I was sitting next to _him _right now.

"I screwed it up. Like always." I replied. Jere just sighed. "She said she was afraid to love me. And I don't blame her. She deserves someone better."

"Yeah, she does deserve some better. Someone better than both of us. But by some miracle, she loves you, she wants _you. _And I think she deserves whatever the hell she wants honestly." I just looked at him for what seemed like minutes but was probably only seconds.

"That may be the dumbest, wisest thing I've ever heard." He grinned.

"I know. Plus, there's this." He drew my attention to a figure in the sand. I had to look twice before I excepted it was what I thought it was.

"Shit." I murmered as I jumped up and ran towards my car. The first drops of rain fell down on me right as I sat down in the driver's seat. I had to find her.

_**It's been a while, I know. Belly was a bit emo at the end of her's there, but it's all for the greater purpose. :D Haha, you STILL don't know what the figure in the sand was! Any guesses? Y'all will figure out in the next chapter, also the last one. :D**_


	16. Infinite

**~~~Conrad's P.O.V.~~~**

I drove around the town, trying to find her. The streets were nearly empty, due to the rain that was now pouring down. I prayed that she didn't try to go anywhere far in this weather, and that she would have the good sense to stay out of the water.

After about fifteen minutes of driving and my third loop around Cousins, I finally spotted her. She was walking down the street, not even trying to stay out of the rain. I was torn between scolding her for not being more careful, warning her of all the possible illnesses she could catch out here, and thanking her for staying out in the open where I could spot her.

As soon as I saw her, I stopped the car, making sure to turn off the engine, but carelessly leaving the keys in the ignition. I ran the half block to her, quickly growing just as drenched as she was. I shouted her name, and she turned around after a long beat.

Her face was wet of course, with what I suspected to be rain and tears. The carefully applied mascara she applied earlier in the day was running down her face also. Her cheeks and lips looked as if they were just touched up with makeup, but I knew it had nothing to do with beauty products and everything to do with the cold temperature outside. She looked beautiful.

The sadness in her eyes almost made me turn right back around. It brought back every feeling of inferiority I had when comparing myself to her. It made me remember that I wasn't nearly good enough for her. But I made myself remember what Jere said. I thought back to the figure in the sand. The one _she _drew.

"Belly," I said quieter. "I was wrong this time." Her face crumpled, and along with it, my heart. I had caused her this pain. She turned her head away and then back at me quickly.

"Conrad, please. There's only so much I can deal with in one day."

"I was wrong, Bells. When you told me that you still loved me, I just, I didn't know what to do. I was torn. Because I do love you. But at the same time, I knew that you deserved better than me, better than what I've done to you. And better than what I can do for you. But I realized that you deserve anything you want. By some miracle, it's me. And I still wasn't sure. But then I saw it, the little sideways eight on the beach. Infinity."

"That's what you were trying to say at the end, wasn't it? That you would always be here for me. Infinity is never-ending. As simple and as beautiful as that." I stared right at her as I finished my little speech. The only thing I could hear was the rain coming down in buckets and the frantic beating of my own heart. She didn't say a word.

Instead she kissed me. I felt as if a million little moments were packed into that one kiss. Everything was there, it always was. I just couldn't believe it had taken us both this long to finally figure it out.

**EPILOGUE**

Conrad and I returned to the beach the next morning to see what treasures we could find after the storm. They say that that storm had been brewing for nearly ten years, just waiting for the right moment to come full force. Do I even have to point out the similarities?

When we saw the little piece of beach that remained untouched by the storm, we nearly fainted. The spot couldn't have been more than two feet all around, and there, right smack in the center, was the little infinity sign I had drawn in the sand. We didn't say a word about it, we each knew what the other was thinking.

Our love was infinite.


End file.
